Luminous Plectrum's Guide to Glastonbury Festival 2011

THE wellies are packed and the crates of Strongbow are stacked. No, it’s not the start of a festival-themed ditty, it means this year’s Glastonbury Festival is all but a day away!
More than 200,000 people are expected to pile into Pilton for this year’s pop extravaganza and Luminous Plectrum will be there to immerse ourselves in hours of musical treats.
While we prepare ourselves to tuck into what is expected to be a giant mud pie, here are some of the acts we are looking forward to this year. Don’t forget to keep up-to-date with all Glasto-goings-on by following our Twitter feed: @LuminousPlectrm

BATTLES – The John Peel stage, Saturday, 9pm

SKULL-penetrating math-rock or dance-infused experimental. Whatever you brand explosive three-piece Battles, there’s no denying legendary John Stanier’s coeserive attack of the drum kit is likely to fell the John Peel Stage on Saturday. Luminous Plectrum is eager to see how the material on newly-released Gloss Drop will fair among the Glastonbury crowd, especially the infectious Ice Cream featuring the vocals of funk-techno maestro Matias Aguayo And of course, the other-worldly Atlas.
Ice Cream (Featuring Matias Aguayo) by BATTLES

QUEENS OF THE STONE AGE – Sunday, The Other Stage, 10pm

ARGUABLY one of our favourite ever bands, Josh Homme’s Queens of the Stone Age are the perfect act to drop the final curtain for another year. No One Knows, Feel Good Hit of the Summer, Regular John, Go With The Flow – the possible inclusions to the set-list are endless and this performance could be the surprise hit of the festival.
Queens of the Stone Age - Little Sister by Sound-Awake

MORRISSEY – Friday, Pyramid Stage 8pm

GOD-like Smiths frontman Morrissey warms up the crowd before U2’s headlining set on Friday and let’s just hope he doesn’t get a whiff of those mouth-wateringly tasty Pieminster stands, eh?
Listen: Morrissey -- Suedehead

WU-TANG CLAN – Friday, Pyramid Stage, 3pm

NEW York City rap-troupe Wu-Tang Clan’s rare UK festival appearance is likely to be a popular fixture for thousands of finely-tuned timetables this year, and for a good reason too. The chance to see Method Man, the RZA and the GZA, Ghostface Killah and Raekwon all on one stage is one not to be missed, and they may even throw in a few hits from their outstanding solo efforts. The thought of hearing C.R.E.A.M, Gravel Pit, Protect Ya Neck, Bring Da Ruckus, really gets us going. Really.
Listen: Wu-Tang Clan -- Gravel Pit

CRYSTAL CASTLES – Friday, The Park, 11.15pm

THIS performance posed the ultimate dilemma for us – it clashes with DJ Shadow on the John Peel Stage. But Crystal Castles’ stage headlining slot is unlikely one to be missed, and the relatively intimate Park stage should create an electric atmosphere. We can’t wait for demonic screaming over a butchered 8-bit beats.
Crystal Castles - Celestica by Crystal Castles

JAMIE XX – Friday, Oxlyers in West, 7pm

OK, it’ll be a DJ set but Jamie XX has been churning out some rather engaging material since the turn of the year. His minimalistic spin and sparkling cymbals should make the mud a tad more bearable.
Jamie XX - Far Nearer (Drvg Cvltvre Slow Grind) by drvg cvltvre

JAMES BLAKE – Saturday, The Park, 9.30pm

21-year-old James Blake’s brand of mesmerising post-dubstep is sure to conjure one of this year’s most intriguing shows. The talented electro-crooner has the unique ability to bring the hairs standing to attention while scrambling your mind at the same time.
James Blake - Measurements by hotfortheencore

YUCK – Saturday, John Peel, 1.05pm

YOU may be feeling yuck on Saturday morning, but Yuck provide an enthralling shot of 90s nostalgia and evoke hazy memories of Dinosaur Jr, Pavement, Mudhoney et al, and within their distorted guitar licks lies pop-tinged choruses perfect to blow your hangover away.
Get Away by Yuck

THE WALKMEN – Saturday, The Park, 4.45pm

THE thought of witnessing The Rat’s rapier-like guitar strumming is already whetting our appetites. A quarter to five slot could swing two ways. Is it too early to witness their epic bar-brawling-esque show, or will it provide the perfect whiskey-induced warmth for Saturday night? We may as well find out.
Stranded - The Walkmen by mickmgmt

RUMER – Saturday, The Pyramid Stage, 3.30pm

ACTUALLY, just no.

We’ll be back after this year’s spectacle with the full lowdown, pictures and videos.
Don’t forget to follow us on Twitter for everything Glastonbury 2011: @LuminousPlectrm

Album review: The Vaccines -- What Did You Expect From The Vaccines?

OUR friends across the Atlantic have been blessed with a stellar roster of guitar bands capable of creating colossal works of thrilling pop music.
Throughout the past decade, the land of the free has berthed The Walkmen, The National, The Strokes etc – mouth-watering acts capable of thrusting six-strings to the forefront of their unrivalled sound.
Now it’s the UK’s turn to topple the American behemoths in the form of The Vaccines – albeit ten years late.
The London-based four-piece, who only formed less than a year ago, have been touted as saviours of the UK indie scene by the likes of NME, the BBC and Clash magazine – similar to the soup of excitement served up for the Arctic Monkeys. Back in 2005, Monkeys lead singer Alex Turner exclaimed “don’t believe the hype” at the beginning of the video for breakout single I Bet You Look Good on the Dancefloor. Thankfully, the frenzy surrounding the Sheffield scallywags was justified. Debut album Whatever You Say I Am, That’s What I’m Not provided a humorous mouth-piece of post-teen life in everyday scenarios that listeners could connect with.
But can The Vaccines’ What Did You Expect From The Vaccines? (note the similar quirky album title) dive into hyperbole and emerge with their early promise in tact?
Well, it depends on what you were really expecting. If you yearned for 30+ minutes of occasionally stimulating, hook-driven indie pop, this is the album for you. If you thought you’d found the UK’s version of The Strokes or The Walkmen, prepare to be disappointed.
The Vaccines are at their best when making anthems perfect for beered-up football terraces.
Riotous opener Wreckin’ Bar (Ra Ra Ra) is fantastic; an urgent 80-second blast thumping drums and punk-driven, distorted guitar melodies, while front man Justin Young screams from the roof tops.
If You Wanna continues Wreckin’ Bar’s energy, forming a galloping pop number on the tribulations of a failing relationship, and its catchy chorus “If you wanna come back, it’s alright” instantly infiltrates the mind, while bouncy pop-punk Norgaard resurrects the much-missed The Rakes with its energetic strumming and candid lyrics on the fairer sex.
The Vaccines are also a dab hand at ploughing through shoegazey epics, such as the grandiose Blow It Up and the dizzying All In White.
But what stops The Vaccines from breaking through the ceiling of mediocrity is their inconsistency. For every catchy pop track (Wreckin’ Bar, If You Wanna), there’s dreary filler (Wetsuit, Under Your Thumb).
Also, Young clearly has the talent to unleash his emotions and inner-most feelings onto paper in some tracks, but in others the lyrics seem rushed and half-hearted.
Post Break-Up Sex is a song that should reflect the fragile, mind-fuck of break-ups; the insecurity, the fear, the sorrow, the sense of loss – we’ve all been there. Yeah, the lyrics are on par (I can barely look at you, don’t tell me who you lost it to/Didn’t we say we had a deal? Didn’t I say how bad I feel?). Unfortunately, the end result here is dry, insipid and rarely goes above second gear.
There’s no denying WDYEFTV? is a solid, if uninspiring debut, but the hype surrounding The Vaccines and regular mainstream airplay will ensure success, regardless of how good the music is.
So I guess the question that needs to be asked is “what can we expect from The Vaccines future?” Hopefully an album of consistent quality, either consistently great or consistently shit. Either way, it’ll be a hell of a lot easier to write about.